Knowledge: Another Nuzlocke
by RoboMonkey2012
Summary: Behold, the continuation to my other Nuzlocke, Bloody Ruby! Be warned: dark as fuck.
1. Identity

~Aspertia City~

I think I am awake now.

I am not sure because still I feel like I am within a dream. I do not think I am in a dream, but I suppose that you do not always know for sure whether a dream you are in or not, correct?

I recall someone telling me once that I sound like Yoda. I do not remember what I had said to that, which is a pity. Perhaps I will find out in eventuality. I do remember who Yoda is and every line he ever said, which is odd since at that moment I do not remember my name.

I am standing inside a small room shaped like an odd shape with many sides. The walls are painted pale purple, and the ceiling is painted in the same way. There is the kind of bed that is elevated with a desk underneath. What is that called? The bed has a quilt and the desk is clean and organized. The carpet is light brown colored and soft. The room is very neat. Inside the closet, the clothing is color-coordinated. I find I like this room for reasons I have yet to understand.

There is a large window with white curtains that shimmer with colors of a rainbow. Then I find that they are not windows, they are doors that go out onto a small balcony like a tower. It is then I realize that this room is at the top of a tower, which I very good and gratifying. From the small balcony, I can see across a city cloaked in winter snow. The sky is gray and cloudy and the air is bitingly cold. I do not feel it very much, though, as I am wearing a soft, white sweater that extends to my knees and denim blue jeans, and a very nice white knit hat with tassels and a brim like a cap and a puffball at the top. I rather like this hat, I decide.

Someone barges into the room, making the wooden door shake on its hinges, and shouting, "ROSIE ROSIE ROSIE YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHAT JUST HAPPENED!"

I whirl in reaction to the name. Rosie? That is me?

I look at the one that barged in. It is a girl of around nine or ten years of age, with disheveled pale blond hair and a green bandana.

I test out my voice by clearing my throat and saying the incredibly intelligent statement of, "...Who?"

This girl straightens her baggy green shirt and plants two fists on her hips. "RO-sie!" she says indignantly. "That's YOU! Rosaria May Whitman, of Aspertia city! Older sister to me, Kate Lester Whitman and Andy Ethan Whitman, and younger sister to the idiot downstairs, Sam Montgomery Whitman! You like the Star Wars, Harry Potter, and Lord of the Rings series and the color purple, hate the color black, speak mostly some other language, and can sometimes be a total Slowbro, especially in the mornings 'cause you take FOR-FREAKING-EVER in the shower!"

She says all of this like she is punching me with her words, quickly, sharply, loudly, and with feeling, and I soak in all of this new information. It helps quite a bit now that I know all of this. But why am I just now realizing it? It does not make any sense.

"R-right," I sputter. "Yes."

Kate(my sister?) seems satisfied. She grabbed by wrist and started dragging me out the door. "It's the Selections! And I'm in them!"

I'm sorry, the what?

But I did not say this, mostly because I did not really know enough of the language she speaks. I understand it, yes, but I cannot form the correct shapes with my mouth and tongue to put my thoughts into words.

I follow my sister(I am still not used to the idea of having a sister, or a family in general, for reasons I cannot understand) down the slightly creaky wooden stairs for three flights past small floors. Why is my room on the fourth floor?

When we reach what I assume is the ground floor, I see two rooms: a kitchen and a living area. A door that leads to what I presume is the bathroom is in the living area. Inside the living area, four people are sitting around a television. There is a woman in a pantsuit with her hair(blond, like Kate's) in a hastily-assembled bun with several pencils sticking out of it, a large man with no hair on his head but an impressive mustache and a tiny pair of glasses, a boy of about thirteen wearing all black with eyeliner and a mohawk that is clearly dyed black, and a boy about eight with a pair of glasses too big for his head.

The television is playing a news station. A man with slicked-back hair is speaking quickly. Something about a journey and last year's contestants, with clips of pokémon battling in the background. I fixate my eyes on the clips. Something tells me that this is not right, what is happening to those pokémon. They are dying, bleeding, freezing to death. And those children that train them are not faring much better, I note as I see a bullet pass through a boy's throat.

Kate sits down on the couch and watches the television with her fists clenched in anticipation. "It's gonna be me this year," she says excitedly.

Is she sure she wants to go out there? It seems...scary. Dangerous. Deadly, perhaps.

More clips flash onto the screen, then they go away and the man says, "And now, the moment you've all been waiting for, this year's contestants!"

The entire family's eyes are fixed to the screen. I do not understand why they are so riveted. If I understood half of what was going on, I would much likely be crying.

"We have...Hugo DeMarkus!"

A picture of a blue-haired boy with dark red eyes.

"Nathan Percy Anderson!"

Another picture of a boy, this one with brown hair and a bandage over his nose.

"And finally, Rosaria May Whitman!"

And then there's my picture.

My jaw drops. That is me, with light brown skin, dark brown hair, dark eyes, a white hat, and round glasses.

"Lucky," says Kate, pouting. "You're gonna go be champion and I'm stuck here."

I search for a word of the proper language. "T-this must be a kind of mistake," I stammer in broken English.

My entire family stares at me, excepting Kate, who's still pouting.

I sink down onto the couch. "I...I..." I stutter. "I can not go out there!"

"It's the law, Rosie, you know that," says my mother, turning the television off. "You have to."

An imbecilic law, if you ask me. But no one asked me, so I did not say this.

The front door opens with a large _BANG._

"Aspertia City Police," a gruff voice demands. "We're here for Rosaria May Whitman."

I shakily stand. "That is me."

My parents hug me. I think my father is crying.

"You'd better be champion, right Rosie?" Kate demands.

I nod and am escorted to the car outside.

Apparently, I have a name. I have a family. I have a past. But why do I not recognize any of it? It does not seem real. It seems like I am still within a dream.

I want to find out who Rosaria May really is. I am fairly obviously not a Whitman. But I will find who I am on this journey. Even if I die, I swear that I will find out.

**-LOCATION: Aspertia City**

**-TEAM: 0**

**-BOX: 0**

**-DAYS TRAVELED: 0**

**-BADGES: 0**

**-SUPPLY STATUS: Not received yet**

**-DEAD: 0**

* * *

Behold, my friends, the sequel to Bloody Ruby! It's a lot darker, so be warned.

And now, the answers to your reviews! Sorry it took so long ^^;

Pure Gamer: I meant it. Miranda Horton has this thing about not remembering Ethan's name. Also, I'm sure you've Googled it by now, but a Nuzlocke is a pokémon game playthrough, only the pokémon die instead of faint and the trainer has to catch the first pokémon he sees in every area, no matter what. There are additional rules, as you could tell by the first chapter, but in order for a Nuzlocke to be in place, the two core rules have to be established. Now I kind of bend the second rule a little bit during Knowledge, but I'll explain that when I post the chapter. By the way, I love your story, _The Champion's Beginning_!

Adin Terim: I'd be lying if I said it was, but I'd also be lying if I said it wasn't. Knowledge isn't the direct sequel, but it is a continuation. I've written and published up to chapter seven on my deviantART account, but I still haven't started leaving subtle clues as to what happened to all the characters from Bloody Ruby.

Zeldagamer123: I've gotten that reaction many a time from many a reader. It's good to know I have a certain flair :D

Anonymous: Didn't realize Aurae creeped you out _that _much. My precious pyromaniacal killing machine is doing excellently!

NodokaLover: Thanks :D And thanks for your review!


	2. Respect

**~Route 19**

**Date: March 12th, 2020**

**Season: Winter**

**Weather: Clouds**

**Temperature: 31º Fahrenheit~**

**New Teammate!**

**Name: Farrah Von Emilie**

**Age/Level: 8/5**

**Species: Snivy**

**Route: Aspertia City**

**-Writes bad Fan Fiction**

**-Hates refrigerator magnets**

If you ask me, the Unovan Trainer Gym Challenge System(C. Tugs for short, for reasons I do not quite understand fully, as the letters are changed around and it sounds similar to the name of a character one may find on a cartoon made in the nineteen-thirties) is unnecessarily complex for trainers from cities Gyms are located in. Particularly for Aspertia trainers, as the Aspertia Gym Badge is required for entering Virbank City.

"Miss Rosa, I suggest that you capture some new teammates before challenging Leader Cheren." This was said by Farrah, a snivy who is my partner given by Bianca for training. She refers to me as "Miss Rosa" for reasons I do not know or care to ask. I have told her to stop before, but she just told me it would feel strange not to refer to me as such, as a sign of respect. I cannot say I remember being respected like this before. My feelings on the matter are...mixed, to say the least.

"I also suggest starting at Route Nineteen, Miss Rosa," Farrah added. She was speaking to me from her pokémon ball, which I had kept her in so I could move more quickly.

"Where does one catch a new teammate, anyway?" I wondered aloud as I sprinted out of the Aspertia gate. My fellow competitors(my "rivals," I suppose, though from the archives of previous Journeys I have seen, trainers usually either never cross paths once they exit their home city or travel together from the beginning, so it is unlikely we will cross paths and be required by law to battle), Nathan and Hugo, had already gone in different directions than me. I had seen Hugo snatch a shotgun off the ground, likely out of sheer luck, so he would have the advantage until later on.

_First thing you do: find a weapon. Any kind will do, so long as you have a general idea of how to use it. Second: Find teammates. They'll have your back in a sticky situation as long as you'll have theirs._

This is what Professor Bianca had announced to all of us when we first began training, wasting no time at all. I had taken these words and repeated them in my head over and over again. Even if I had no clear goal for myself in this journey, I knew one thing, and that was that I would not be killed. I would fight for my life, and, if it came down to it, I would take the life of another.

"Miss Rosa, be careful," said Farrah. "Wilderness Pokémon can be quite hostile."

I skidded to a stop, kicking up a layer of snow and ice off the ground. "So when is it they come out?" I asked. "You obviously know more on this subject than I do."

"I suppose they come out randomly," said Farrah, shrugging.

"Well hopefully we will get a good teammate," I said, scanning the area. Huge trees covered in frost sticking out of the snow told me where the route's boundaries were. The sky was gray and cloudy as normal. Patches of tall grass over my head stuck out of the snow. I found it hard to believe pokémon hid in that. It seemed scratchy and cold.

I stepped forward, further towards the patches of tall grass.

Farrah popped out of her ball. "Allow me to go first, Miss Rosa," she said.

No sooner had she said that then a brown blur tackled her to the ground with a _THUMP_ and a spray of snow.

"The hell are you doin' on my territory?" the blur demanded, pinning Farrah's shoulders to the ground.

"Pardon me, miss," Farrah said, poison seeping through her polite words. "But my trainer and I were simply passing through." Then she took her vines and threw the offender off.

The offender stood up, evidently furious. This is when I can tell that it is a girl perhaps a bit older than Farrah, and a good bit taller, with a thin, brown tail with a white part at the end. A pair of red-and-yellow goggles sits on her forehead, which she then tugged over her eyes to charge Farrah again. "Bullshit!" she spat, lodging her elbow into Farrah's ribcage. "Y'all just wanna bring those damn guns and knives to screw up 'mons lives 'cause ya already wrecked your own damn species!"

Farrah is unfazed by the girl's onslaught of four-letter words and knees her opponent in the stomach. "I haven't the foggiest idea what you mean, miss."

The girl jumps away and kicks Farrah in the side of her head. "A'course you do! Trainers are humans and humans screw things up!"

"You are sorely mistaken, miss," said Farrah, catching her opponent's foot and knocking it away. "Not all humans are as you say."

The girl fell backwards. "What's with all the "miss" stuff?" she says.

"Because I show respect to my opponents," said Farrah, looking to me. I enlarged one of the five given pokémon balls given to me by Bianca, reading Farrah's non-verbal signs. "And my teammates."

The girl's eyes widened. "Holy crap, you're not saying-"

_THUNK!_

The thrown ball flies from my hand and hits the girl in the forehead. It vibrates once...twice...three times.

_...Ding!_

I am not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing that I now have a foul-mouthed, violent patrat on my team.

"And that, Miss Rosa, is how one captures a pokémon," says Farrah, dusting off her skirt.

**New Teammate!**

**Name: Quintayla Ann Richards(Quinn unless you fancy being castrated in your sleep)**

**Age/Level: 9/4**

**Species: Patrat**

**Route: 19**

**-Keeps a sketchbook full of drawings**

**-Really wants a pony**

**-LOCATION: Route 19**

**-TEAM: 2**

**-BOX: 0**

**-DAYS TRAVELED: About four hours**

**-BADGES: 0**

**-SUPPLY STATUS: Excellent**

** -INVENTORY: First-aid kit, blanket, matches, water bottle, 4 pokéballs, pokédex, map of Unova**

**-DEAD: 0**


	3. Falling

**~Flocessy Town**

**Date: March 13th, 2020**

**Season: Winter**

**Weather: Clouds**

**Temperature: 29º Fahrenheit~**

_I am standing on a red beach._

_The vast bloody ocean has receded, leaving the waves splashing upon rocks smattered in shades of crimson. The sun burns bright and hot, suspended above my head. The sand is rough and rocky, not unlike the sand of shores in Hoenn. Though how I know this, I am not sure. Hoenn is supposed to be the enemy of Unova. And in addition, as far back as I can remember is simply being chosen, being pulled from my supposed family, and fighting. Training. Bleeding. Perhaps I am simply nonexistent, put into Rosaria May Whitman's body by mistake._

_There is someone that looks like me in front of me. She, I immediately recognize as Rosaria May Whitman, the girl with the white hat and glasses and twin braids hanging over her shoulders._

_"Where are you?"__ she asks. Her voice is smooth and soft. She is speaking another language, though one I immediately recognize as not English and one I know much better. I find this odd. Everyone I have met speaks English, and there seems to be stigma about ones who do not. I feel unnerved at Rosaria speaking this language to me, yet comforted at the same time._

_"I don't know," I say. The words come out of my mouth automatically. The contraction I never use, merely because it feels like I am not using the intended words to their full potential. English really is an amazing language, it is just so complex I occasionally feel like screaming and moving somewhere the people do not have anything to do with that language._

_"Who are you, then?"__ Rosaria asks, pointing to me._

_"...I don't know," I sigh. "Why? Do you know who I am?"_

_"You're using my body,"__ she says. __"Do you remember who you are? Because I'm sure you're not me. You're not Rosaria May Whitman, I am."_

_"I don't remember who I am. You're Rosaria May, but I'm not. So who am I?" I say._

_"I don't know,"__ she says. __"But we know you're not me. That's step one."_

_I sigh. "I was hoping for a clearer answer."'_

_"Well, I don't know who you are. That clear enough?"__ says Rosaria. __"Only you know that. I guess you just don't remember."_

_I roll my eyes. "No, I'm just messing with you."_

_"That's a mean way of messing with me,"__ says Rosaria, folding her arms and completely missing my deadpan joke._

_"That's sarcasm," I deadpan. "Why are you here? Isn't this _my_ dream?"_

_Rosaria opens her mouth, but no sound comes out. She slowly turns transparent, like she's turning to glass. I watch, my eyes wide, as she falls backwards and her body shatters on the rough sand. The red sky opens with a mighty_WHOOSH_, a brilliant blue fissure appearing among the shades of red._

_The waves begin crashing with more force than before, and the ground cracks with the sand dunes whirling with no wind. The sun grows larger and larger, and chunks of red sky splash into the sea and drench me in icy water. The painfully blue layer begins running through the cracked red sky and flowing in a churning, bubbly river up through the cracks in the rough, sandy ground._

_I cannot move. I am frozen as the brilliant blue death eats away at my feet. I dare to watch as the acid consumes my skin, muscles, all the way down to the bones in my feet. But it does not stop there. As I fall to the ground, getting the acid on my elbows and arms, it continues eating up my legs and arms. Every moment I stay awake is agony, killing me slowly and painfully. Sounds of torture escape my mouth as I feel my internal organs dissolving into the blue acid. I am unconscious but still able to feel pain by the time the blue acid eats its way over my face._

~I'm just a line break, nobody loves me~

With a gasp, I am awake, my body drenched in sweat, but I am shivering as if I had slept in the snow outside the window of my room in the Flocessy Town Pokémon Center. My hands claw at the sheets as if they are a nest of snakes and my heart is pounding.

I blink a few times and slow my breathing, throwing off the covers and rubbing my hands over my face. It was just a dream. A very bad dream.

Farrah gently opens the door. "Miss Rosa? Are you up?" she asks.

I mumble something about not getting a good sleep before I realize I'm still speaking another language. I switch and say, "Yes. Is Quinn up?"

Farrah rolls her eyes. "Yes. She is presently stuffing her face at the buffet table."

I nod and pull on my blue jeans and hooded sweatshirt. "You should go down there, too and make sure she does not explode."

Farrah gives a nod and leaves the room as I stand up and stretch.

_Who am I?_ I wonder. The thought comes into my head offhandedly, but it catches me off-guard. But I do not ponder over it for long. Instead I leave the room, locking the door and taking my key with me.

In the lobby, employees are bustling around preparing for a festival of some sort. I notice lots of pastel-colored streamers and ribbons and confetti shaped like flowers. One girl in a polo shirt is pasting oversized, colorful butterflies to the cream-colored walls. I had not realized there was a holiday coming.

"Yo Rosie!" Quinn calls, waving me over from one of the booths. "You gotta try this stuff, it's awesome!"

"I still can't believe you actually ate five pancake stacks," Farrah says incredulously, shaking her head in wonder as I walk over to the booth where Quinn sits beside a stack of empty, dirty plates with syrup and grease smeared all over her face.

"What is a pancake?" I ask, picturing a frosted birthday cake sitting in a cooking pan. Ridiculous, I know.

"That," says Farrah, pointing to the stack of five flat, brown circles of dough covered in syrup, jam, and butter on Quinn's plate, which she is still inhaling. Not literally, though, as she would choke and die had that been the case.

"Interesting," I say, reaching for Quinn's plate. "May I try some?"

"No way, get your own," says Quinn with a mouthful of the breakfast food, scooting her plate away. "Buffet's over there."

"Miss Quinn, that is quite rude," says Farrah. "The proper conduct would be 'The pancakes are on the buffet over there to get your own, if that isn't too much trouble.'"

Quinn sticks her middle finger up at Farrah. "Fuck you, bitch, I do what I want," she says, which is met with a roll of the eyes from Farrah.

She is right, of course. The pancakes are delicious.

**~Flocessy Town gates~**

"At least tell me you're bringing more food," Quinn complains from her pokéball as I walk out of Flocessy Town's concrete gates into the snowy wilderness. I can see grass and weeds breaking through the slowly-melting snow and ice and new buds forming on previously winter-bare trees.

"Well, everyone has to eat at some point," I say as I begin walking with my feet crunching on the snow.

What follows is relatively uneventful, so I see no point in dictating twelve miles of walking, Farrah and Quinn arguing over which style of fighting is better(Quinn's being up-close, dirty fistfighting and Farrah's more of a lithe, graceful form of throwing knives, using oneself as a projectile, and strangulation) with more than occasional snide comments from both parties, Farrah's stealth insults, and Quinn's wall of curses. A writer can only spell so many english swears, you see.

When the clock on my Pokédex reads nine P.M. and the temperature has dropped to twenty degrees at the maximum, I nearly run into a frozen wood post sticking up out of the ground. Offhandedly, I wonder if had I stuck my tongue to the wooden post, would it stick as if I had stuck my tongue to a metal post? An experiment for another day, I decide, and open the positioning application on the Pokédex.

"Do either of you know where Flocessy Ranch is?" I ask Farrah and Quinn, who have delved past arguing into game after game of Go Fish.

"What, are we doing something?" Quinn asks. "'Bout time. My legs are falling asleep."

"I remember reading about it in one of Professor Juniper's books," says Farrah. "It's run by an old couple, the Griffins. You can hire mercenaries here, if I remember correctly."

I think this over. "Mercenaries are not counted against the one-capture-per-area rule, correct?"

"I don't think so," says Farrah. "You can find Psyduck, Mareep, Azurill, Riolu, Patrat, Lillipup, Pidove, Dunsparce, Audino, Basculin, Marill, Azumarill, Poliwag, Poliwhirl, Politoed, and Herdier in Flocessy Ranch, according to the guide."

"What guide?" I ask. "I do not recall recieving a guide."

"That's probably because you didn't," says Farrah. "I memorized a trainer's guide before being partnered with you, Miss Rosa. I thought it would help."

"And it certainly will," I say, looking up at the post and ignoring Quinn snorting, "Heh, nerd." Then I see that it is not a post, but the side of an archway into a fenced-off area. I can see lights coming through thick foliage, presumably from a house.

"Ranches mean food," says Quinn.

"Did you figure that out all by yourself, Miss Quinn?" Farrah quips.

"Fuck you," Quinn says to her. "So go on. I'm hungry here!"

"You're always hungry. That can't be healthy," Farrah complains as I walk through the wooden archway.

The walkway leading into darkness is made of hard-packed dirt. It has been sprinkled with salt to keep it from freezing, and it crunches under my feet. A line of grass and weeds sprouts from between the two paths. I assume that a car or truck often drives over this path. Foliage obscures my view of the source of the yellow-orange light, though by this time I can hear sounds of laughter. The moon is high in the clouded sky, and the temperature is likely fourteen or fifteen degrees. I sardonically wonder if whoever decides what trainers wear during the Journeys enjoys seeing children freeze to death.

As I move closer to the light and sounds of laughter and am able to see the outline of a large house surrounded by a wooden fence, I stop a few yards away from the door as a wave of uneasiness comes over me. The people inside seemed to be having quite a good time. Perhaps they would not welcome three uninvited guests, after all, especially since one will likely empty their refrigerator given the chance. I still cannot see through the foliage fully, but if I peek through the branches of a shrub I and squint I can see a window with the silhouettes of several people, a dozen at least.

"Go on!" Quinn urges. "I can smell the casserole from here!"

"It does smell delicious," Farrah admits. "And inviting."

I shuffle my feet nervously. "I do not know about that..." I mutter. "What if they do not want any more guests?"

"It's worth a try, don't you think, Miss Rosa?" Farrah asks. "Besides, I'm sure we both would rather not listen to Miss Quinn gripe about being hungry for the rest of the night."

I sigh, turning towards the door. "I suppose you are right."

Before I can back out again, I take a deep breath...

And knock.

**-LOCATION: Flocessy Ranch**

**-TEAM: 2**

**-BOX: 0**

**-DAYS TRAVELED: Almost 2 days**

**-BADGES: 0**

**-SUPPLY STATUS: Excellent**

** -INVENTORY: First-aid kit, blanket, matches, water bottle, 4 pokéballs, pokédex, map of Unova**

**-DEAD: 0**


	4. Celebration

**~New Lavender Town**

**Date: March 14, 2020**

**Season: Winter**

**Weather: Clouds**

**Temperature: 29º Fahrenheit~**

**New Teammate! (2)**

**Name: Meng Alexander**

**Age/Level: 12/10**

**Species: Riolu**

**Route: X**

**-Hates everyone, including you**

**-Teaching herself pre-calculus for fun**

**Name: Nala Diamond**

**Age/Level: 9/10**

**Species: Lillipup**

**Route: X**

**-Enjoys thinking up conspiracy theories**

**-Sharpens her canines every day**

_The blue acid comes again tonight, but it is not alone. Rosaria's face haunts my nightmare, her flesh slowly dissolving and revealing gray, hollow bone. I am helpless as the acid consumes me, turning my blood to fire and bones to ash and eating the flesh off my body. As Rosaria reaches her gray bone hand towards my melting eyes, I am burning. I am melting. There is no air. My eyes contort the images around me into nonsensical pictures of torture; blades and gigantic spiders and icy wind that laughs wickedly, flowers that strangle me with their enormous stems and cough poison down my throat, iron spires of flame and death, and the ghostly Rosaria taunting me. I am nothing. I am a memory. I am a parasite._

_I want to shout at her that she is wrong, but my vocal chords have melted into hot tar in my throat and the painfully blue acid glows as it rends muscle from bone. I wish to die to end the horrific torture my own mind is inflicting upon me, but I cannot. I keep reliving the nightmare, over and over again. I wish to scream but my throat is blocked. This, I imagine, is what hell feels like._

~Never look a gift line break in the mouth~

I snap awake, my forehead beaded in sweat and breathing heavily. I am so relieved I want to cry. It was only a dream.

I am not in a Pokémon Center room, this I can tell despite the room being dark. The sheets are softer, the pillows plush, and I do not hear the sounds of Farrah and Quinn breathing. There is complete and utter silence.

I immediately begin to worry, but then my addled mind pieces together the events of the previous evening. This is the Flocessy Ranch House, one of the smaller guest rooms. I came here last night and ate my first good meal in I do not even know when. Farrah and Quinn are in another wing of the house. It must be about two AM, too early for anyone to be up. The logical thing would be to go back to the clutches of sleep. Of course, this is easier said than done after the aforedescribed dream.

So I lean my head back against the plushy pillows, staring at the dark ceiling as my pupils dilate and the darkness reveals details of the room. The framed piece of needlepoint on the wall. The ancient vanity on the opposite wall. The gently-shifting sheer curtains and the tiny air vent. The room smells of talcum powder and furniture polish and kitty litter. If I listen closely, I can hear crickets and cicadas outside. Through the window, fireflies flicker and dance among blades of wet, cold grass. If it makes any sense, I can hear more in the darkness than in the light.

I do not remember falling asleep again, but when I do it is blessedly dark and dreamless.

~The grass is always greener on the other side of the line break~

I see no point in dictating the following hours, so I shall instead pick up the story to when I am traveling again after paying for two mercenaries to accompany me on my journey temporarily.

"Oh, Miss Rosa!" Farrah pipes up as I nearly pass a crooked wooden signpost that has likely been there for over a hundred years.

I skid to a stop and kick up slush from the road. "Is something wrong?" I ask.

"Quite the contrary," says Farrah. "Today is a holiday!"

"Oh yeah!" says a new teammate, a lillipup named Nala. "It's the start of Genesis Week!"

"Pardon?" I ask. "What is Genesis Week?"

I had not realized Quinn had been drinking something, but I find out when I hear the sound of spraying. "You don't know what Genesis week is?" she says in disbelief.

"It's a week-long new year's celebration that also heralds the coming of spring," says Farrah excitedly. "There are fireworks and games and food and celebrations and-"

"And awesome deep-fried festival food!" Quinn chips in.

"And fireworks!" Nala repeats, her speech picking up speed. I wonder if I let her talk long enough, her words would reach the speed of light. "I love fireworks! Most species like me don't really like fireworks, but I do 'cause they're so awesome and colorful and cool and explodey!"

The fourth team member, Meng, remains silent. Perhaps she is asleep, though I wonder how through the combination of Farrah, Quinn, and, of course, Nala. What few words she has said are dark and nihilistic, so perhaps there is not much for one such as herself to say on the matter.

I check my pokédex. It is just after one o'clock and Quinn has been griping about hunger for the past half-hour. The sky is blue in patches, mostly covered in gray-white clouds moving swiftly across the sky in the cool wind. The frozen signpost says _New Lavender, .5 mi., Kanto, 4124 mi., Pokémon League, 400 mi., Hell, you are here., Virbank, 34 mi.,_and_ Flocessy, 5 mi.,_ the various arrows pointing north, northeast, south, east, and northwest respectively, excepting Hell, which does not point at all and is instead carved into a sphere on the top.

"I suppose we could experience this 'festival,'" I say. "I do not think it would harm anything."

"YES!" Quinn and Nala shout, albeit about different things. I can practically hear Farrah grinning. Meng remains silent, though she does give a soft grunt of acknowledgement to let me know she is not dead, unconscious, or asleep.

With the mostly-unanimous agreement, I begin sprinting the half-mile northwards to New Lavender Village.

~Don't count your line breaks before they hatch~

I had thought I was prepared for what would come in New Lavender Village.

I was wrong.

As soon as I set foot past the gates, my five senses are assaulted with smells, colors, noise, and chaos. Kites and streamers fly through the air, all brilliantly colored and in shapes of flowers, stars, and rainbows in addition to the standard kite shapes. Confetti punched into various shapes associated with happiness float about in the wakes of people, rickshaws, bicycles, wagons, and strollers, fired from cannons perched at the tops of buildings. Children run barefoot along the cobblestoned streets waving lit-up sparking sticks, which I am sure violates at least three public safety laws. Smells of pastries and dishes from around the world combine and waft through the bustling streets, entering my nostrils and making my stomach growl. Shouts of delight and the voices of merchants hawking their wares mingle with bicycle bells and horns and the sound of a hundred people walking and running at once echo off the sides of the tall, slightly precarious buildings. I can smell freshly-caught and cooked fish all the way down the streets from the docks, and I hear the occasional boat's horn and engine rumble mixing with sounds of water against the boardwalk. The sun hits the sprays of freezing seawater as it peeks through the clouds and sends up temporary rainbows. Most of all, I can feel happiness and joy running through the veins of these people, who have let go of their worries for a week of celebration and love.

I can see why my team was so set on attending this festival.

My reaction, in a word, was stunned. I had never seen so many people in one place before. It was overwhelming.

_I suppose we will stay for a period of time,_ I think as I begin walking through the festively-decorated streets for a holiday I do not know. But I suppose that now is as good a time as anything else to learn, yes?

**-LOCATION: New Lavender Town**

**-TEAM: 4**

**-BOX: 0**

**-DAYS TRAVELED: 2 1/2 days**

**-BADGES: 0**

**-SUPPLY STATUS: Excellent**

** -INVENTORY: First-aid kit, blanket, matches, water bottle, 12 pokéballs, pokédex, map of Unova**

**-DEAD: 0**


	5. Nightmares

**~New Lavender Town**

**Date: March 15, 2020**

**Season: Winter**

**Weather: Clouds**

**Temperature: 15º Fahrenheit~**

_I am blessed without the blue acid tonight._

_I am floating among black fog, invisible and inaudible to all. How I know this, I do not know. I can just tell._

_There is a girl in front of me. Not Rosaria or myself or anyone I recognize. She is tall and very thin, and her wrists are cuffed in front of her by the black fog shaped into restraints. I cannot see her face, I can only see her red bandana and stringy brown hair._

_She looks straight at me, but does not seem to see me. I can see a long, deep scar on her neck. Her body is glowing in a faint, pinkish-violet aura that pulsates like a heartbeat._

_A smile creeps its way across her face. I cannot see her eyes. She is smiling like a madman, a smile that makes me wish for the blue acid._

_Her form changes._

_She becomes a tall woman in her late twenties, with dark brown hair tied into a bun. Her skin is the same color as mine. She wears a deep brown women's business suit and her fingernails are long and black. She holds the hand of a small girl, perhaps three or four years old. I am chilled by the serious face of the child, the way she stares into my soul and pulls out the secrets. No dream-self-invisibility will fool her._

_Her eyes are blue, a piercing blue, a blue I see every time I look into a mirror or frozen puddle._

_That is when I know that this girl is me._

~oOo~

My eyes open with a snap. I am breathing heavily as if I had just climbed a mountain and shivers are running up and down my spine as if a ghost was breathing down it.

As a precaution, I turn around and see no sign of ectoplasmic anomalies, undead or otherwise.

There is something off about this town. I can feel it.

However, I cannot explain exactly how I feel it. I merely know that something is very, very wrong with this town. It is like there is a signal in my subconscious.

A signal.

Something clicks in my mind, and I throw off the Pokémon Center bedcovers and rush out the door, not bothering to change out of my sleepwear or put on shoes. All I know right now is that something is very, very wrong and this signal in the back of my skull is the key to finding out what.

New Lavender Town seems like a different town than the lively, happy one my teammates and I arrived at yesterday. Buildings cast terrifying shadows across the moonlit streets with paving stones that jab into my feet. Now is the celebration for the other side of New Lavender, the side that embraces its namesake across the ocean in Kanto and its rarely-known nickname: The Town Where Souls Go To Live Once More.

The signal tells my body where to go, showing complete disregard for any bodily harm I face such as stepping on broken glass or running into lampposts. My brain merely keeps me running and prevents me from being afraid. If I am afraid now, I will never know.

It is below freezing at two in the morning, ergo my breath steams and before long my feet are completely numb. Fog blots out most lights, so I run blindly through the streets, praying to every deity I can think of I will make it back to the center.

When the signal tells me to stop, I am standing on wet grass in a small field dotted with stones. Through the fog in front of me, an enormous stone tower looms over twelve floors tall, easily the tallest building in the town. How had I missed that?

My heart is pounding so loudly I can hear the thump-thump, thump-thump increase its rate with every cautious step I take towards the gothic entryway. I am not sure anymore whether this is not another nightmare played by my cruel imagination.

Wisps of mist curl delicately towards me, whispering things in my ears, things I cannot understand. Things about spiders and terrorists and a mother's love.

That is when my vision darkens and I lapse into unconsciousness.

~oOo~

I wake up the next morning back in the Pokémon Center bed, unsure whether last night even happened or not.

When I see the cuts on my feet, however, I realize that it was not a nightmare.

Fear is someone I know well from the nightmares of the past nights, but I have never encountered him in the waking world until he stretches his cold fingers down my spine with the realization that someone is controlling me. Suddenly, despite the fact that the room is heated, I feel like someone has dumped the remainder of winter down my back in a dry, frozen heap, robbing all the oxygen from my lungs and the room. I sit on the edge of the bed, the covers dragged off and pulled around my shoulders, trying to breathe in or out or anything at all, for at least fifteen minutes before I manage to gulp a desperate breath of air. When I begin to breathe normally again, I take the blankets off my clammy shoulders and rub my face with my hands, inhaling and exhaling as deeply as I can.

_"Focus, Rosa,"_ I instruct myself in my native language of Spanish. It always soothes me. _"You can't give up now just because of some bad dreams. You have to find out who you are._


	6. Challenges

**~Aspertia City**

**Date: March 24th, 2020**

**Season: Spring**

**Weather: Cloudy**

**Temperature: 37º Fahrenheit~**

**New Teammate! (2)**

**Name: Key Forrester**

**Age/Level: 6/14**

**Species: Sunkern**

**Route: 20**

**-Enjoys fencing**

**-About a zillion times smarter than the rest of the team**

**Name: Andrea Newton**

**Age/Level: 5/14**

**Species: Azurill**

**Route: X**

**-Speaks in the third person**

**-Loves flowers, particularly daisies**

I face the tall brownstone building looming above me with Farrah, who has been with me since the beginning, at my right side. News vans and reporters swarm about behind a barrier, snapping their pictures and rolling their cameras.

It will be my time to face the Leader, a man named Cheren Marten, in one minute.

I repeat the vows I said to myself this morning in my head. _I understand the risks of this battle._

Forty-five seconds.

_I face the danger head-on knowing the consequences of failure._

Thirty seconds.

_Should I lose today, I will never set foot outside Aspertia's walls again._

Fifteen seconds.

_Should I win, I will continue my journey no matter the casualties._

Ten seconds.

_This is my job._

Five seconds.

_This is my duty._

Four seconds.

Three seconds.

Two seconds.

One second.

_This is what I must do._

The enormous doors swing open silently on perfectly-balanced hinges. It is time.

I block out the reporters and noise, and stride into the arena with Farrah at my side.

"It has been an honor battling with you, Miss Rosa," says Farrah, bowing to me before I return her into her pokémon ball per gym policy and take my place on the challenger's platform at the opposite end of an indoor arena the size of a soccer field. Benches line the perimeters behind unbreakable glass panels, protecting the spectators from the carnage of battle. Leader Cheren stands at the opposite end, his scars from his past journey gleaming in the fluorescent light. He is not smiling, not happy to see me. He reminds me of Professor Bianca in this way; both damaged and broken by the same things.

"Leader Cheren," I say, stronger than I truly feel. "I hereby challenge you to battle."

Leader Cheren raises his arm with his first pokémon to be sent out inside, and I do the same.

"So let it be, and may the best trainer win."

_BING._ The bell symbolizes the beginning of the battle. In milliseconds our first pokémon are out: my new teammate Addie and his patrat, Nicolai.

Addie, having the greater speed, begins the battle by giving him her best Charm attack, using her big, innocent blue eyes to lower his guard. Nicolai, however, appears to be immune. Having failed her charm attack, Addie uses her Normal-type strength to her advantage and strikes him with a direct punch to the midsection. A trickle of blood comes out of Nicolai's mouth, but he is far from done. He takes zigzagging steps towards Addie and punches her right across the face, loosening one of her front teeth which she was bound to lose anyway.

Addie is unsteady on her feet after seeing her own blood. I do not take the chance of confusion and switch Addie for Meng, who throws herself into battle like she was fired from a cannon. Using her Focus Punch, she strikes Nicolai twice: once in the neck and once in the ribcage. Nicolai reels and stumbles back on his feet. Meng shows no mercy and kicks him across the face, the toe of her boot getting him in the temple and no doubt giving him a severe concussion.

There are rules for when a pokémon is unable to battle, and if they get a concussion or other severe injury is one of the causes to declare a pokémon unusable for the remainder of the battle. The bell sounds again and Cheren calls Nicolai back.

"Excellent job, Meng!" I call to Meng, who does not seem to have any injuries other than a nick on her tail, which will heal quickly. She gives me a quick salute before whipping around to face Cheren's next pokémon, a pidove I have heard being called Faye.

Meng pulls her staff off her back when it is clear to her Faye is stronger than Nicolai was. Faster, as well, shown by when she zips forward and punches Meng in the stomach. Meng staggers, and I call her back.

Farrah, being at the highest level, is my first instinct, but I do not act upon it. Farrah, being a Grass type, is weak to Faye's Flying type. Instead I send out Nala, who is still at full health.

Faye takes to the air when she sees Nala, who cannot fly. But both Nala and I know that Faye cannot stay up in the air forever. Though Nala appears to have her own plans and runs towards the end of the arena to take a running start and jump, clamping her teeth around Faye's ankle.

Faye yowls in pain and a spurt of blood erupts from her ankle. Nala may not have intended that, but she has ruptured an artery. There is little Nala can do to finish the job but end it quickly by kicking Faye in the back of her head.

Faye is recalled, but if Leader Cheren feels any grief, he does not show it. He sends out his final team member, a lillipup, Richard, I believe.

Richard springs fourth with bloodlust, clamping his jaws around Nala's shoulder. She screams and I recall her for the stasis of the pokéball. I send out Farrah, who loyally springs into action as she wraps her vines around his neck. Richard slashes through the vines and tackles Farrah with all his weight. They fly halfway across the field before skidding to a stop somewhere in the center.

Farrah still has some fight left. She kicks Richard in the chest and knocks him back, while she stands back up. However, Richard is ruthless and uppercuts Farrah in her ribs. She makes a strangled gasp and a spray of blood flies from her mouth as she flies back onto the hard ground and rolls a few yards before coming to a stop. She's straining to move and I'm about to recall her when Richard takes her head in his hands and just like that, he snaps her neck like it was a toothpick.

Farrah's body lands with a final _thud_ on the ground. I am frozen, staring at my starter, my young, innocent starter that always used titles and fought with Quinn like they were a bizarre combination of lovers and siblings, lying motionless on the arena floor.

I do not send out Quinn, she flies from her pokémon ball with a roar straight out of my nightmares and launches herself at Richard, ripping his throat open with her teeth. She becomes a monster from the grief and pain and rage, ripping Richard limb from limb as if dismembering his corpse will bring Farrah back to life. My stomach heaves and I vomit into a nearby trash can at the spectacle of Richard's macerated body. When there is nothing recognizable left of him and Quinn is drenched in his blood and her own, bleeding freely from an X-shaped cut across her face, she falls to her hands and knees on the battlefield and lets tears of pain and rage and grief flow freely from her face, mingling with the blood. I recall Quinn and fall to my own knees, having triumphed at the battle today, but at what cost?

~oOo~

In the Pokémon Center, I stare at my newly-earned Aspertia City Gym badge, shining brightly in the palm of my hand. Farrah was lost today, and all for a moronic little trinket. I cannot believe how childish I was, thinking that being able to continue my journey is worth losing my starter.

I cannot bring myself to throw the badge on the ground and instead stuff it in my pocket, not wanting to look at it.

I think of my remaining teammates, the ones who have now seen official battle and have seen their fellow team member die. Quinn, now my strongest team member, will bear the X across her face(miraculously, it missed any major sensory organs) and the trauma of her teammate's death for the remainder of her life. I cannot blame her at all if she despises me now. I was the one who was not fast enough. I was the one who let Farrah die.

I am grieving for Farrah, truly I am. But I cannot show this. I must be strong, be a leader for my team, or I will look weak. I must complete what I was chosen to do to find my lost memories. My mother I saw in my nightmare, is she alive? I must know. And I will not know if I am trapped inside Aspertia's walls.

I will find out who I am, if it is the last thing I am ever to do.


	7. Pain

**~Aspertia City**

**Date: March 25th, 2020**

**Season: Spring**

**Weather: Cloudy**

**Temperature: 40º Fahrenheit~**

I do not sleep at all that night. I know what to expect now: visions of torture and madness wrought upon my consciousness by my own mind, sensations of unbearable pain so real and lucid I forget it is not real and wake up feeling as if my flesh is melting off my body and acid is pouring into my lungs, only for everything in the waking world to jab my brain with a cold, sharp rod and remind me of my nightly terror. I fear I will not last particularly longer in my tortured state.

Not sleeping at all, as it proves, is easier than I had thought. I have many thoughts on my mind that will not leave me alone, scenarios playing on infinite repeat in my head. The red beach, the shattering glass, the blue acid. My team abandoning me because I am not a skilled enough trainer to prevent my starter from dying. It is at least better than dissolving night after night, but worse in its own, painful way.

Those delightfully lighthearted thoughts and my sleepless night accompanying me, I slowly drift into the purgatory that will be the following day.

Joy of joys, Professor Bianca has invited myself, Nathan, and Hugo to a gathering at a local restaurant called _Angel's Revenge._ She mentioned an unspecific object intended for our use, but would not tell me what it was. I may only wonder until she decides to reveal this "surprise."

However, the matter of speaking to my team about the battle the previous day still stands between myself and the luncheon, a matter I would honestly rather avoid but I recognize there is no getting around it.

So I let out my team: Quinn, Meng, Nala, Addie, and Key, and prepare to begin.

"You fucking son of a bitch." Quinn beats me to the punch, quite literally, swinging her fist across my face. Although it is my full right to hit her back, I do not. "You let Farrah die. YOU LET HER DIE."

"I was not fast enough," I agree. "It is entirely my fault."

"To be completely fair," Meng cuts in. "It's kind of Cheren's fault, too. I mean, it's his pokémon that killed her."

"Don't talk about her like she's some kind of statistic!" Quinn snarls at Meng. "She was my friend! She was..."

Quinn stops and turns away from us, her eyes filling with moisture. She doesn't continue to speak.

"I fully realize this is rather hard to swallow for all of us," I say, realizing a split second after the words are out of my mouth that that is possibly the understatement of the century. "But we must keep moving. We cannot stop."

"That's just what trainers are supposed to say, isn't it," Nala says, her voice emotionless as she pulls her knees to her chest. "It's what you always say when someone dies. Like it's some kind of rule that you can't just stop and do nothing when someone dies, even if they were your friend. Maybe some of us need to."

"You know that's not true," Meng says to her.

"Yes it is," Nala says, her voice rising. "Every time someone dies, we're always told to get over it. Does it even_matter_ that we're upset? Does it even _matter_ what we think?"

"Nala, stop," Meng says.

"No, you stop!" Nala shouts angrily, standing up, tears running down her cheeks. "I'm sick of trainers and humans in general treating pokémon like they're just some other dead kid and to get over it! I'm sick of pokémon dying for no good reason and their friends just having to move on and get over it! I'm sick of never seeing my friends get the remembrance they deserve, all because of the trainer's stupid honor!"

"Nala-" Meng says, more forcefully.

"Shut up!" Nala shrieks. "Just shut up! I hate all of you!"

Nala runs out of the room. Meng tries to grab her wrist, but she yanks it free and runs out of the room in tears.

"Should we go after her?" I ask Meng.

Meng shakes her head. "She does this sometimes. We'll give her a few minutes and I'll go look while you're at that lunch-thing."

I sigh. "I have much to learn, clearly, such as how to speak correctly."

"Yeah, that could've been better worded," Meng agrees.

Addie tentatively raises her hand. "Addie's scared," she says, her small voice quivering. "Addie doesn't wanna die."

"You will not die," I promise, crouching down to her level and rustle her short, blue hair. "It will be fine."

Key looks at me with her dark eyes, as if she's trying to read my mind. I wish I could promise that it will really be fine and mean it, but I cannot. I do not foresee the future, and I cannot change it. But for their sake, I hope it really will be okay.

I return my team, save for Nala, who is out-of-range, and sigh. That was more difficult than I had thought.

I place my pokéballs back in my backpack and stand up, mentally preparing myself for the luncheon. I hope it will go more smoothly than that.

I know the restaurant the Luncheon is being held in before I see the name because I see Professor Bianca's thick wheelchair treads in the melting snow. The Angel's Revenge stands in front of me, a short and stout restaurant of stucco and glass. Through one of the windows, I can see Nathan and Hugo talking to each other, and Leader Cheren holding hands with Professor Bianca, whom I can only see part of since I cannot actually see through walls.

I let Meng and Quinn out and tell them to search for Nala, then walk into the restaurant.

I am recieved well, or at least I perceive so. "Hey, Rosie! Long time no see!" Nathan says enthusiastically, crushing my ribs in a bear hug. I do not think he knows his own strength.

"Crushing me," I gasp, and he lets go and messes up my hair, which wasn't particularly neat to begin with. I barely remember to wash it, let alone keep it in the two neat braids Rosaria had it in. One of these days I will take a knife to it to get it out of my way.

"Nice to see ya, Rosie," he laughs, and pulls out a chair at the wooden table everyone is sitting around. Hugo nods in my direction. I make a brief bit of eye contact with Leader Cheren, but it doesn't last and I avert my eyes to the grain of the table. Professor Bianca is speaking quickly with a waiter, her right hand clenching the armrest of her wheelchair.

Professor Bianca clears her throat as the waiter walks away. "Welcome, everyone," she says in her voice that commands attention. "I'd like to keep this short and sweet today, so no pointless chitter-chatter. Yesterday, all three of you recieved the Basic Badge from the gym right here in Aspertia. I'd like to congratulate all of you on your performances."

She and Leader Cheren clap for a few seconds, then stop. Leader Cheren clears his throat and says, "Which is why we, as this city's pokémon authority, would like you three to accept a special responsibility."

Professor Bianca looks straight into the eyes of each of us in turn as if reading our thoughts. Leader Cheren pulls a small case out from under the table and sets it on top before undoing the clasps and opening the case.

Inside are three pokéballs encased halfway in foam. There's a pink sticker on each of them, but I do not know what that means.

"Take one, each of you," Professor Bianca says, gesturing to the three pokéballs with her hand.

I reach for the one closest to me and turn it over in my hand, feeling the smooth, plastic surface and wondering what could be so special.

"What's in them?" Hugo asks.

"You'll find out soon enough," says Professor Bianca. "Now, if I'm correct, our food should arrive soon."

She is correct. The food arrives just as she says it, and I do not know how she knows my favorite dish, but she does somehow.

The rest of the luncheon goes smoothly and uneventfully, though it goes a mite long for my tastes and I am eager to leave the company of organic lifeforms, which is why I dash off earlier than Nathan and Hugo, eager to leave Aspertia City's walls behind. However, I catch up with Quinn and Meng first.

"Did you find Nala?" I ask.

Meng shakes her head. "I don't get it. We've checked everywhere."

"Little shit's a fucking ninja," Quinn mutters, kicking a rock. "Dunno where a hyper little puppy'd go in a place like this, but wherever it is, we sure as fuck haven't found it."

I frown. "This is worrying."

"Maybe she got outside somehow," Meng suggests halfheartedly. "Though to be honest, I don't think we'll find her."

"We will look outside the walls," I say as I return Quinn and Meng. "She cannot have gone far."

I exit through the gates and am in the dense forest when I hear the airplane louder than usual. Airplanes and helicopters are commonplace in Unova, but this particular one sounds closer, and somehow more dangerous. Chills run down my spine for no reason, and then I hear the whistle. It starts off high and gets steadily lower-pitched.

Realization springs to mind like an idea fired from a cannon, and I bolt, putting as much distance between myself and the city as I can.

Sirens begin to wail in Aspertia, my suspicions coming true all at once.

A burst of light from behind me, then a split second later, an earth-shattering roar and explosion accompanied by a blast of heat that knocks me forward into the snow.

More whistles, more explosions, more bursts of light. I run as fast as my legs will carry me away in any direction from the explosions, the sirens, the screams straight out of my nightmares.

When the explosions end, there is nothing but complete and utter silence, and the smoking hole where a city of thousands once was.

**-LOCATION: Route 19**

**-TEAM: 4**

**-BOX: 0**

**-DAYS TRAVELED: 2 weeks**

**-BADGES: 1**

**-SUPPLY STATUS: Excellent**

** -INVENTORY: First-aid kit, blanket, matches, water bottle, 10 pokéballs, pokédex, map of Unova**

**-DEAD: 1**


End file.
